5 Things That Have Kept Me Alive

5 Things That Have Kept Me Alive

Life rarely unfolds the way we imagine it will.

We grow up with an expectation—a fairytale, really—of how things should be. But one random day, that illusion slips. The veil lifts, and reality hits: life is unpredictable, messy, and feral.

At that moment, you’re faced with two choices: attack with determination or give up.

If you’re lucky, you might have people around who inspire and support you to fight. But often, it’s a battle you have to face alone.

I’ve been there. I gave up. My life had become the opposite of what I’d dreamed, and I felt exhausted and unwilling to fight. But one day, I chose to. I found inspiration in others—their drive, their determination—and slowly, I discovered the things that made each step a little easier. Not a fix, because there is no single fix, but a combination of practices that have kept me alive.

1. Practicing Gratitude

When you’re in a dark place, gratitude can feel absurd. What could there possibly be to be thankful for? But starting small—even microscopic—makes all the difference.

I began by being grateful for things I took for granted: the ability to walk, to speak, the desire to change. As I practiced, my focus shifted. I started seeing the good in my life: my incredible friendships, a cozy home, my growing business. Slowly, I realized how abundant my life truly was.

Try this:

What can you be grateful for right now?

What happened this year that surprised you and brought gratitude?

Who in your life can you appreciate today?

2. Intentional Reflection

Looking back and reflecting are not the same. Reflection needs intention.

Our memories often spotlight heightened emotions—frequently negative ones. Painful memories can feel overwhelming, but reframing them changes the narrative. Take, for example, the end of a relationship. At first, all you might recall is the heartbreak. But with reflection, you can recognise the freedom it brought, the clarity about your needs, and the strength you gained.

Try this:

Think of a painful memory from this year. Acknowledge the emotions it stirs. Now, find three positive outcomes it led to:

What did you learn?

What did it change?

How did it help you grow?

3. The One More Rule

When everything feels overwhelming, breaking it into manageable pieces can make it bearable. I discovered this through running.

During a long run, the idea of finishing 8 more kilometers can feel impossible. Instead, I focus on just “one more”: one more step, one more minute, one more landmark. Before I know it, I’ve pushed past the urge to stop, one small goal at a time.

This rule applies to everything—writing, working, even just getting out of bed.

Try this:

The next time you feel like stopping, set a tiny goal: one more paragraph, one more rep, one more page. Let that be your focus, and forget the finish line for now.

4. Not Dead Yet

It’s a blunt mantra, but it’s one that keeps me going: I’m not dead yet.

It’s a reminder that as long as I’m alive—breathing, moving, functioning—I owe it to myself to keep trying. Even when things feel impossible, this simple phrase brings me back to the fact that I’m here. And because I’m here, I have a chance.

Try this:

When you feel stuck or hopeless, repeat this mantra: I’m not dead yet. Use it to remind yourself of your strength and resilience.

5. Seeking Inspiration in Others

When my motivation waned, I turned to others for inspiration. Watching their drive and determination reminded me that it was possible to keep going, even when I didn’t feel like it. Surrounding yourself with people who ignite that spark in you can be life-changing.

Try this:

Follow people who inspire you.

Reach out to friends who lift you up.

Join communities that align with your goals and values.

Final Thoughts

Life is feral—it doesn’t come with a roadmap or a guaranteed happy ending. But through gratitude, reflection, small steps, and resilience, I’ve found ways to navigate its chaos.

I hope these five practices help you too. Because no matter how messy life gets, you’re still here. And that means you’ve got another chance.